129137

Joke of the Day

"Books vs. Mexicans Q: What do books have that Mexicans don't? A: Papers."

"Why do Cows have hooves instead of feet? Because they lactose."

"Knock Knock. *Who's There?* A Kid! *A Kid Who?* A kid who cant reach the doorbell."

"They found Bruce Willis dead next to a bottle of Viagra... ...I guess he *Died Hard*"

"No, really, you should definitely reblog fifty more versions of that ""Keep Calm and Carry On"" poster."

"Behavioral (/ be_have_voyeural) Economics Q: why do some people pay WAY too much at auctions? A: more bid curiosity"

"Four Types of Orgasm. 1.Spiritual....""Oh God"" 2.Positive.....""Oh Yes"" 3.Negative....""Oh No"" And, 4.Fake......""Oh [insert your name here]"""

"I don't appreciate my son's teacher circling all the wine stains on his homework."

"Parallel lines have got so much in common. It's a shame they'll never get to meet."

"My Wife's Accident The police knocked on my door last night, ""It looks like your wife has been in an accident,"" said one officer. ""I know,"" I replied, ""but she's good with the kids."""