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Joke of the Day

"A priest and a rabbi are walking in the park. The priest turns to the rabbi and asks, ""How much do you charge for circumscisions?"" The rabbi responds, ""They're free, but I get to keep the tips."""

"I get hit with a lot of folding chairs for someone that's not a professional wrestler."

"What travels down an alley and is full of holes? Batman's Parents."

"Old age is nothing but a computer with 1000 GB of memory running on a celeron processor"

"What did the bun say to the hot dog? I relish the fact that you've mustard the will to ketchup to me!"

"I had a colonoscopy done the other day and I think it went really well... As I was walking out I overheard the nurses talking about me and I could hear one saying ""What an asshole!"""

"Police officer: Ma'am do you know why I pulled you over? Me: I'm just as confused as you are."

"My cock-eyed professor had a really bad day today. His pupils got way out of line. It made him so angry that he couldn't see straight."

"What do you do if you see your stepmother hobbling around in the backyard? Reload."

"What happens when devil worshipers do the rain dance? PrecipiSatan"