128326
Joke of the Day
"Happy Mothers Day to all of the moms out there! Scared you didn't I?"
Next Joke
"Do you really have to be skinny to wear skinny jeans or can you be a big fat giant monster? (asking for my big fat friend, Colleen)."
"You've got a face even an Instagram filter couldn't fix."
"I expected a medal for my bravery when I had a full-leg cast on. Instead, I got atrophy."
"What does Mark Wahlberg eat for breakfast? Funky Bunches of Oats"
"Why does everyone find the absolute value of zero so funny? l0l"
"""So all you have to do is scroll down the screen to reverse her progression from sexy prom queen to fat soccer mom."" - Facebook's Timeline"
"Me: *texts* How'd you sleep? Him: *texts* Horrible...I was tossing and turn- Me: *crawls out from under his bed* I KNOW, YOU POOR THING."
"So apparently it's rude if somebody asks if you have a light & you tell them they'll have to go to the end of the tunnel to find it..."
"Why did the Trump campaign order its followers to destroy all fax machines? They thought it was spelled ""facts."""