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Joke of the Day
"Why is it warmer near the corners of a room? Cause they're at 90 degrees."
Next Joke
"I bought a vacuum cleaner six months ago... ...and so far all it's been doing is gathering dust."
"They used to call them jumpolines... until your mom used one."
"""Wow! Can you believe it's almost June already?!"" YES DEB, I AM WHOLLY MYSTIFIED BY THE NATURAL PROGRESSION OF TIME ON PLANET EARTH"
"Everyone keeps saying Marry Christmas to me... I'm so confused. Who's this Christmas girl and why does everyone want me to marry her?"
"Set a man a fire and he'll stay warm for a few hours. Set a man on fire, and he'll stay warm for the rest of his life."
"Our relationship is like an extra chromosome It's all downs from here"
"What do you call an indecisive German Shepard K Nein"
"You hear what happened to the beauty pageant contestant that came out covered in beef cuts? she was ms. steak'n... and got grilled"
"Knock, knock. Honey, have you finished taking pictures of yourself for facebook? Daddy needs to take a sh!t.."