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Joke of the Day

"Things we can't say by color. Things a white person can't say: The ""N"" Word. Things a black person can say: ""Thanks for the warning officer."""

"I got an email telling me that it was vegan month... I felt bad putting the message in spam."

"How many hipsters does it take to change a light bulb? It's a really obscure number. You probably never heard of it."

"I wonder what Cannibals & Aztecs would say, watching civilized people eat symbolic hearts of loved ones on Valentine's Day."

"My wife is weird... She begins every conversation with ""Were you even listening to me?"""

"My cats are named Ra and Isis. In ancient Egypt, they would have been gods."

"What happens when you tell a sexist joke to a feminist mod? [Removed]"

"I have a joke about pizza and a broken pencil unfortunately it's cheesy and pointless"

"british waiter: what topping would ye fancy on yer pizza? british guy: tea british waiter: jolly good choice [both laugh britishingly]"

"What did the nucleus say to get the electron up? Up and atom!"