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Joke of the Day

"So They Cancelled Halloween In India This Year. They ran out of Ghandi."

"If the only tool you have is a dildo, everything looks like its ready to nail."

"Why did the LAPD leave the Dodger game early? They wanted to beat the crowd."

"This is how the disaster happened. Poop : knock knock. Anal sphincter : who is this?? Poop : Fart. Anal sphincter : OK. Pass!"

"What's the saddest thing about being a chicken? You only get laid once."

"What did the mama cow say to the baby cow? (x-post from /r/3amjokes) [It's pasture bedtime!](http://www.reddit.com/r/3amjokes/comments/1y8d67/what_did_the_mama_cow_say_to_the_baby_cow/)"

"It must be hard to be the fat kid in your classroom... And must be even harder for Kim Jong Eun, who is the only fat kid in his country."

"How often do I see alligators? Ocajunally"

"Did you hear about the guy they found dead at the Mediterranean restaurant? Yeah, police are calling it a hummus-cide."

"I'm glad I found out it's illegal to destroy US currency. I was about to feed $50 bills through a shredder."