127277

Joke of the Day

"I asked a wise man about the secrets to success.. He explained ""There are two things in the world that you need to know to be successful. The first is never tell anyone everything you know"""

"I told my friend I had HIV... She asked me if I was sure. I told her I was positive."

"What's the worst part of haveing a long dick nsfw You keep stepping on it when you tuck it in your shoe!"

"Doctor said I had kidney failure. I asked ""How can that be? I am an adult, I have adult knees."""

"What does DNA stand for? National Dyslexic's Association"

"Q: What do you call a cow with a twitch? A: ""Beef Jerky!"""

"Mum: Jackie go outside and play with your whistle. Your father can't read his paper. Jackie: Wow I'm only eight and I can read it"

"Had to get sticky tape and gift tags surgically removed from my body at the hospital... Proving once again that white guys can't wrap."

"Let us all take a moment of silence to remember the many socks lost in the past and the fucking dryers that stole them."

"R.I.P to my good friend Brian Eaten by a pack of dyslexic zombies."