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Joke of the Day

"If the emoji I wanna text is not in the ""recently used,"" you may have to wait 3 days till I find it."

"My MOM Says Life is A Race Life iS A Tragedt When SeeN In CloSE-UP, LONG-SHOT. To Truly Laugh, You Must be Able to Take Your PAIN, And PLAY With iT!"

"I've said it before and I'll say it again... I've said it before."

"What do you call a doe that swerves all over the road? A rackless driver..."

"Wife: How many women have u slept with? Husband: Only you, Honey. With everyone else, I was awake."

"I asked my wife for the newspaper I said to my wife, ""Get me a newspaper."" ""Don't be silly,"" she replied, ""you can borrow my iPad."" The spider didn't see that coming."

"#IHaveJustEnoughMoneyTo pay my phone bill so I can call my credit card company to tell them I don't have money to pay them."

"*aggressively skips to my Lou*"

"What do you name an African tech startup? Double Click! (Okay, Khoisan only.)"

"How many mods does it take to switch a light bulb? [deleted]"