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Joke of the Day

"A man in New York gets stabbed every 52 seconds... Poor bastard.."

"I heard the catchiest joke yesterday... Women's softball."

"The government forcibly took over MarshallMathers.com They cited Eminem domain"

"How do you kill vegetarian vampires? With a steak to the heart."

"[NSFW] What's the difference between an 18yo and a washing machine? You can dump your load in a washing machine and it won't follow you round for two weeks telling you it loves you"

"I'm surprised more people don't Photoshop a cleaner house into the background of their pictures."

"What's the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chickpea? (From u/cherryslurpee) I won't pay 100 bucks to have a garbanzo bean on my face."

"Establish dominance. Never let a dog lick you first"

"You'll have to excuse me. I've just been going through a weird time since birth."

"the liberal media won't report that I can easily do 100 push-ups because they are frightened"