126303

Joke of the Day

"Do you know why Parisians only have a single egg for breakfast? Because in France one egg is un uf."

"What do you do if your GF is having siezures in the bathtub? Throw in your laundry."

"In Louisville, KY where bars are open till 4 am. Here's my slogan for them: ""Get upchucky in Kentucky."""

"eBay is so useless I tried to look up lighters and all they had was 13,749 matches."

"There's a fine line Between a numerator and a denominator."

"A guy walks into a bar with jumper cables around his neck... Bar tender looks at him and says, ""I guess I'll let you hang out but you better not start anything."""

"Define Irony: redditors using the death of reddit as a way to farm karma"

"It's almost that time of night where I drunk text my ex ""I have to tell you something"" then shut my phone off."

"ME: Mint choc chip ice cream, pls. I got my own cone [places it on counter] EMPLOYEE: This is a traffic cone? ME: You must be new here."

"I would like to order a sandwich.. Oh wait. Wrong sub"