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Joke of the Day

"I changed my password to ""incorrect"". So whenever I forget what it is the computer will say ""Your password is incorrect""."

"She died doing what she loved: Running for her life in the wrong direction."

"What should you buy if your hair falls out ? A good vacuum cleaner !"

"I hate when I find a show on TV that I like and I start to get into it and then I realize that it's my neighbor's window and he looks angry."

"I hate tacos. Said no Juan ever."

"He tells the punchline first. What's the worst thing about a time traveling comedian?"

"I was having sex with my wife... and asked her how it felt. She grunted and groaned and said it felt like two. So, I reached down to investigate. The damn thing had done gone and doubled up on me."

"[one month later] Sorry, just got your text. Do you still want to break up?"

"GOD: Done. ANGEL: What is it? GOD: A penguin. ANGEL: So it can fly, right? GOD: This one's a swimmin' bird. ANGEL: Dude... are you ok?"

"A man walks into a Swedish chemist shop..... ... and asks for some deodorant. The shopkeeper says 'ball or aerosol?' The man answers 'neither, I want it for my armpits."