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Joke of the Day

"Saw a big girl wearing really short, shredded denim shorts. I'm going to assume those were jeans before she hulked out."

"Which Vice President was the best at making beats? Algorithm"

"A cowboy goes into a shop to buy condoms Cowboy: ""Give me 3 packets of condoms, please."" Cashier: ""Do you need a paper bag with that, sir?"" Cowboy: ""Nah.. She's purty good lookin'....."""

"I met the donkey from Numbers 22... He was a pretty cool guy... What? Did you expect him to be an ass?"

"I hate it when gross couples tell you they're trying for a baby and you have to picture them fucking for a second."

"Whats green, has six legs and if it falls from a tree it will kill you? A snooker table"

"I've written a joke about a fat badger, but I couldn't fit it into my set"

"If Hilary Clinton is elected president, what title will they give Bill? First Lady's man (;"

"I was in a cafe the other day when I overheard this: ""Can you please stop listening to our conversation?"""

"WHAT'S UP WITH ALL THE SILENT TREATMENT?! ~me, drunk, at a wax museum"