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Joke of the Day

"Next time I see a dead deer on the side of the road, I'm gonna leave and come back dressed as Santa with a sign that says ""Help, need ride!"""

"How did the hillbilly find his sister in the woods? Attractive."

"What's the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chick pea? I never had a garbanzo bean on my face."

"A Shout Out to all the beautiful women who don't need to dress half naked to get a man's attention. Stay classy! The rest of you, come with me."

"My mate says I don't understand irony... Which is ironic, because we were at a bus stop at the time."

"I think the best thing about being a house wife is that you would get to be married to a house!"

"Do you know why god created leprosy? He needed someone to lend him a hand!"

"Why was the farmer disappointed when he tried to marry his prized melon? Because the minister wouldn't marry the two, since a melon can't elope!"

"irony - Using words to mean the opposite of their literal meaning. ironey - Made of iron."

"What is Hannibal Lecter's favorite Jane Austen quote? **""There is no charm equal to tenderness of heart.""**"