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Joke of the Day

"In American politics, what's important is that you pick one of two equally bad sides and defend it no matter the awful garbage it produces"

"Why does nobody play poker in the jungle? Too many cheetahs"

"Brain: We've got lots to do today. Body: You're on your own buddy."

"What do you get when a dragon sneezes? Out of the way. Thanks League smh"

"Dear Grocery Bagger, Please don't put dryer sheets and bread in the same bag. My kids don't like peanut butter & Spring Meadow sandwiches."

"Why do hunters make the best lovers? Because they go deep in the bush shoot more than once and they eat what they shoot."

"What's the difference between a hippo and a zippo? One's really heavy and the other's a little lighter."

"I didn't want to wake up this morning and go to work. It's not that I don't like my job, it's just"

"Why female sys-admins restart systems more often then men? Because they love those new boots!"

"Someone just told me ""if you don't believe in Santa Claus, he'll never visit!"" So on that note, I no longer believe in cancer."