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Joke of the Day

"Leaving early on a Friday and saying, ""Have a good weekend!"" to people who have to work a full day is like dancing in front of a paraplegic."

"Why didn't Hitler ever order the French Dip sandwich when he went out to eat? Because he hated au jus."

"Jeb Bush just tweeted a picture of a gun engraved with 'Gov. Jeb Bush' with the caption 'America' At least he'll never have to get it re-engraved"

"How many Jews can you fit in a car? One hundred. Five and the rest in the ashtray. (An Austrian friend told me this joke.)"

"Why are there no knock-knock jokes about freedom? because freedom rings. Happy Independence day everybody!"

"Barbie comes with GI Joe She only fakes it with Ken. Saw plenty of pregnant Barbie jokes in this sub-reddit, but not this one."

"I have a talent for only attracting people I have no interest in dating."

"""I am doing well."" - Russian man having sex with a well"

"Does running out of a burning barn make a cow unusual? No only medium rare!"

"What do you call a 5 year old with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor"