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Joke of the Day

"A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says: ""A beer please, and one for the road."""

"Hey Southpaw, going to lunch? Of course, I also have the right ..."

"what do you call a male suppository? A manpon"

"If simply wrinkling my nose at your smell is politer than spraying you head to foot with Febreze then so be it. Not happy but so be it."

"My daughter is starting to ask embarrassing questions about sex. Just yesterday she asked: ""Is that the best you can do?"""

"What do you call a beach where you go to shoot gorillas and break Islamic law? Haram Bay"

"I hate being bipolar. It's awesome!"

"Welcome to Condescending Club. Even an idiot would know the 1st rule. If not, you want paaaatronizing club. You know what that is, riiiight?"

"Why does it take pirates so long to learn the alphabet? Because they can spend years at C!"

"how to see if theres a american on this post bill nye the science guy"