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Joke of the Day

"TIL... Tomorrow I learned that Steve Buscemi was a volunteer firefighter on Sep...."

"The best part about Ray Lewis being on ESPN is.. I can hear a guy with six kids by four different women lecture me about commitment & dedication."

"When I was a kid I asked my Dad if Abraham Lincoln was jewish. ""Well,"" he said, ""he was shot in his temple."""

"If I get interviewed by a police sketch artists, my only goal will be to see how far I get before he realizes I'm making him draw a pirate."

"Have you heard the one about the three holes in the ground? Well, well, well."

"Do you want to hear a joke about sports cars? Are you sure? It contains spoilers!"

"When does CPR become Necrophlia? When tongue is involved."

"Any subreddits to help you cope with schizophrenia? Asking for a friend"

"Did you ever try to shave your own butthole? It's a real pain in the ass."

"*CAN'T OPEN THE PICKLE JAR* SHERLOCK: (suspiciously) Moriarty..."