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Joke of the Day

"how do you kill two priests toss a small boy between them and watch them fight to the death. The winner has to fight Michael Jackson"

"What do you give Sean Connery when hes eating nachos in a bathtub? Shower Cream"

"Need to build an Ark? I Noah man..."

"When should I send a picture of my cat to my boyfriend? I checked online and they keep saying I should make him wait to see my pussy, but I don't see what the big deal is."

"Why did they put Harriet Tubman on the twenty dollar bill and not Barack Obama? Because if that were the case, you'd never get change."

"how can you tell if you have amnesia? what was the question?"

"Police officer: what'd you take, you're sweating, shaking and going crazy.... Perp: nothing sir, just searching for The Lord!"

"I just wished a Bride-to-be good luck on her first marriage. She didn't seem to appreciate my sincerity."

"Why did the dolphin go to church? He was looking for a porpoise. (thought this one up but I doubt I was the first one that did.)"

"A man walked into a bar He was knocked unconscious....."