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Joke of the Day

"*puts on Rocky theme music* *cracks neck* *cracks knuckles* *stretches* *jogs in place* *picks up phone to call mom*"

"What happened when the icicle landed on the sowmman's head? It knocked him cold."

"Two wrongs don't make a right. Unless you're Chuck Norris. Then two wrongs make a roundhouse kick to the face."

"What do you call a woman with one short leg? ilene."

"Snow is like the Jews ... Won't make you feel uncomfortable as long as you have a working furnace"

"What happened to the man running in front of a car? He got tired. The man running behind the car -- he got exhausted."

"I T H I N K W E S H O U L D R U I N P E O P L E S T I M E L I N E B Y T W E E T I N G L I K E T H I S A L L D A Y . . . . ."

"if it's called morning wood for men then what is it for women.. Morning dew."

"Did you know that Dublin, CA has the fastest growing population of all time? The populations always Dublin'. :D"

"A drinking game where you do a shot every time you are prompted to update Adobe"