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Joke of the Day

"Why does WalMart have so many handicapped parking spots? Because they want to have some available to customers too!"

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"What is the difference between a gun and a feminist? A gun only has one trigger"
"I have one friend who is very creepy and intense and whenever we take a photo together all I can think is ""this will be on Dateline someday"""
"I'm classically trained in the art of Nintendo."
"You and I share a very special connection. *I'm parked outside your house using your Wi-fi."
"ABORTION BILL A congressional aide asks a politician, ""What are we going to do about the new abortion bill?"" The politician replied, ""Shhhhh -- just pay it."""
"For our 25 year anniversary, my wife asked me for a present that goes from 0-200 in seconds. I got her a bathroom scale."
"Please don't share 9/11 jokes, I lost my dad on 9/11 He took over 2500 infidels with him"
"Hansel and Gretel is a timeless tale about the importance of killing old ladies."
"Why did the hospital put all of their gynecologists on salary? Because the ova time was killing them."
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