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Joke of the Day

"I've invented a new form of martial arts which involves fighting over a penny. It's called Jew-Jitsu"

"I wonder if Southern Belles say ""I do declare"" a lot when they're doing their taxes."

"What do you call a stock market crash in Japan? The ""My Yen"" Apocalypse"

"A joke I've been working on. So a guy dies in a car wreck. He wakes up waiting in a line labeled automotive accidents. The guy in front of him and says "" You from South Carolina too?"""

"My dad died of severe hemorrhaging, and my best friend was disabled by ischemia. Different strokes for different folks, I guess."

"What do you call a jackass in the mafia? A donkey."

"Me and my best friend reverse our cars everywhere together. We go back a long way."

"I need some sugar. Not the stupid kind that gives you mono, but the good kind that gives you diabetes."

"In honor of MLK day: Why don't black people sleep? ...Because the only one that had a dream was shot."

"""Mommy, why did Santa decide to deliver presents on Jesus' birthday."" Shits about to get REALLY dishonest up in here."