122461

Joke of the Day

"Alarm clocks should come with sounds like ""doll feet running into the closet"" Because I AM NOT HITTING SNOOZE WHEN I HEAR THAT SHIT"

"A Facebook friend posted 8 pictures of himself fixing a lawnmower, so I drove over and shot him. It just felt like the right thing to do."

"Stealing my little brother's (fellow Redditor) original joke, hope he sees it and is pissed. What do you get when you cross a pig and a Christmas tree...? A Porky-Pine"

"What's the real reason Mr. Clean is always smiling? He likes it dirty."

"Condescending Joke You"

"Just ate a bunch of confetti... Now I'm a party pooper."

"What are swearing outdoor grills powered with? Profane tanks."

"I'm not saying she's a slut but she's had more people inside her than the statue of liberty!"

"Did you know Justin Bieber has an 8 inch cock? Yeah, but it's up his ass and it belongs to Usher"

"God took a paternity test He found out he was the father, the son and the holy spirit."