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Joke of the Day

"I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but I'd love to be the bear of bad news. ""The bad news is, you're gonna need stitches. RAWR!"""

"Future generations will never believe Sarah Palin was a real person."

"I'm single by choice. Not my choice, but still a choice."

"What brown, steams, and can be found under a piano stool? Beethoven's last movement."

"What does a piano, tuna, and a bucket of glue have in common? You can tuna piano but you can't piano a tuna! Don't ask me about the bucket of glue though... I've been stuck there for a while"

"I wasn't originally going to get a brain transplant but then I changed my mind"

"What did the hipster stoner call his marijuana pipe? Ira Glass"

"I'm okay with Rob Ford illegally using the HOV lanes... He technically counts as three people, doesn't he?"

"Knock knock new fone who dis"

"What did the little boy with no hands get for Christmas? Cancer."