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Joke of the Day

"Joke. What do you call a man without arms or legs who gets into a fight with his cat? ......Claude!"

"They found Ellen Degeneres dead today. She was face down in Ricki Lake. Did I do it right this time?"

"A man... A man tried to catch fog, he mist"

"What dinosaur knows the most words? Thesaurus. :/"

"That whole ""letting go"" of your ex is always more satisfying when they're dangling over an abyss."

"What kind of bird opens doors ? A kiwi !"

"Hello, I'm a bird, I survived since dinosaurs roamed the earth but windows are too much for me to figure out."

"On a walk, my son saw a pay phone asked what it was. I made him look it up on his Blackberry."

"I once went to a blonde psychiatrist She blew my mind."

"Two bananas are relaxing on a river bank... When a turd floats by. The turd shouts over. ""Come on in the waters great."" One banana turns to the other and says. ""Do you believe this shit."""