122025

Joke of the Day

"""I'd like you to go down to the shop and ask for a matteryogi."" *""But, what's a matteryogi?""* Nothing Boo Boo"

"Me: Let's try it have a nice weekend without any fighting, ok? Hub: Agreed Me: Wait, where are you going? Hub: Fishing. See you Monday"

"Dad, i know I'm adopted Hi adopted, im not dad."

"Anybody have plans to stare at their phone someplace exciting this weekend?"

"My aunt found a lump below her left breast recently. It was my penis."

"""Thank you for coming."" ""It was mandatory."" #corporateshows"

"What's the difference between a priest and acne... What's the difference between a priest and acne? Acne waits until you're 14 to come on your face."

"I really need to go on the show Survivor. Not for the money or the fame. It's just the only way I'm ever gonna effectively lose weight."

"What did the rubber ball say when he left the yo-yo's late night house party? You better get some sleep - I'm gonna bounce!"

"A is for Apple - Hester Pryne"