121956

Joke of the Day

"Me: My daughters are 15, 13, and 10. Her: Do you want more kids? Me: Hahahahahahahaha Her: Is that a no? Me: *Deep breathe* Hahahahahaha"

"Girl: What do you like to do in your free time? Guy: I spy on people. Girl: Really? I like to take long walks in the park and go to the movies with my friends. Guy: I know."

"Do you know what is 4 inches in length, 2 inches in diameter, and drives women fucking crazy? An empty toilet paper roll."

"Mom, i'm going out -You are not going out with that mini skirt. -But why? -Because they can see your balls, David."

"What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you? Run like hell. She's got a grenade in her mouth."

"Setp 1: Learn Spelling"

"I came....I saw.... I'm a lumberjack who needs to stop watching porn & get a *life*...."

"An Indian can do anything for sex Even marriage"

"Him: my name is Robert but my friends call me Bob, you can call me whatever you like. Me: Cool, nice to meet you Nachos."

" Metric dollar."