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Joke of the Day

"The Socratic method of deductive reasoning walks into a bar and the bartender says ""So. What don't you want?"""

"What did the Mexican say after two houses fell on him? GET OFF ME HOMES!"

"Wife: I left the kids with you for a half hour & they dumped 3 pounds of sugar in the dryer trying to make cotton candy. Me: Did it work?"

"If a Nun changed sex... Would that make them a tran-sister?"

"I killed my twin because she wouldn't admit that she was the evil one."

"Trying not to ask my blind roommate if he masturbated too much."

"Why do virgins never stand still? They are used to being chaste."

"I want ""Wake me if anything cool happens"" on my tombstone."

"a crazy spanish train commits a murder because some guy slept with his train-wife that's a loco motive, ese"

"Why do witches not wear underwear? So they can get a better grip on their broom."