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Joke of the Day
"I wrote a song about a tortilla Actually it's more of a wrap"
Next Joke
"[first day on the job as a drug dealer] *giggles* ""We don't have coke, is Pepsi ok?"" *gets stabbed*"
"What's Helen Keller's favorite mouthwash? Jergen's lotion."
"Say ""Oh my God"" 5x fast, then say ""I got 'em"" 5x fast.. Have you found Jesus? Lol, jk.. But they sound pretty similar, don't they?"
"Parallel lines have so much in common... It's a shame they'll never meet"
"A guy walks into a bar... And says ""ouch."""
"One time I called my teacher ""mom"" and she looked so confused and said ""I'm not your mom."" It made the rest of homeschooling really awkward."
"Q: Why did the scientist install a knocker on his door? A: He wanted to win the no bell prize!"
"My haunted house would be one where guys jump out w your tax forms improperly filled out & others handing you phones with your mom on hold."
"What does the south call friends with benefits? Cousins....."