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Joke of the Day

"Interviewer: where do you see yourself in 5 years? Me: In a mirror! Well any reflective surface really, windows, shiny cars, puddles..."

"If you love someone, set them free. If they return... something, something, Justin Bieber's a lesbian."

"Did you hear about the cow who gambled on an airplane? The steaks couldn't have been higher."

"I was looking through the living room window at the tree I'd just planted and I thought to myself ""Why didn't I plant it out here in the garden?"""

"My paper rips a lot It's tearrible paper."

"My GF called me ""behind the times"" today. I got so upset, I paused the VCR, paged my friends & asked them to fax me their best advice."

"I heard that wordplay was illegal. Apparently there is serious PUNishment."

"Why does Dr. Pepper come In cans? He's a strange dude."

"This ceiling fan keeps knocking over my ceiling furniture."

"What was Hitler's favourite video game? Mein Kraft"