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Joke of the Day

"sitting is bad for u, but the standing desk is all wrong. i present to u... *unveils computer hanging from ceiling with a bed underneath it*"

"Why do Klingons feel very little pain? They produce a lot of endworfins."

"I said to my wife's mother ""when you're dead, I'll dance in your grave."" she said: ""Good, I'm being buried at sea."""

"Silence doesn't mean your sexual performance left her speechless."

"remember when people would choke on cinnamon to entertain the internet"

"First time sex. I would tell you but the joke would finish to fast."

"I should make a gym that only accepts fat people I would get tons of business, tons"

"Got pulled over while doing calculus in my car last night Cop said I was deriving over the limit."

"Whats up? My dick."

"Why do american bears have forelimbs? They have the right to bear arms"