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Joke of the Day
"This guy at my work fell into the upholstery machine today. Don't worry, hes fully recovered."
Next Joke
"Doctor told me I have cirrhosis of liver How am I going to cure my alcohol addiction now!"
"2016 Election Honestly hurricane Matthew should run for president because I think he left the biggest mark on the country"
"Wanted: Personal psychic for wealthy client. Salary: $10,000 per week plus bonuses. Free accommodation. 10 weeks paid leave per year. Company car. Generous pension scheme. You know where to apply."
"Why did the balloon go near the needle? .... Why did the balloon go near the needle? He wanted to be a pop star."
"Why do you love your puppy more than you love your wife? Because the puppy only knows the tricks you taught her"
"What's the coolest answer to a multi-choice question? B)"
"4-yr-old saw picture of me pregnant. I explain that she was inside me. She thought for a bit then said: ""I never want to do that again."""
"Anybody heard about that new drug for lesbians? Trycoxagain"
"Charles Dickens walks into a bar He orders a martini. The bartender asks, ""olive or twist?"""