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Joke of the Day

"I'd make a joke about desecrating animal corpses But it would just be beating a dead horse."

"When Spongebob has sex he wouldn't make the girl wet. He would dry her up."

"COP: ""Do you know why I pulled you over?"" ME: ""So it wouldn't be windy when we talked."""

"If I exit the bathroom stall singing ""Break On Through (To The Other Side)"", it's best to avoid shaking my hand."

"A WASP goes into a clothing store to buy a suit. He asks a salesperson, ""How much is this one?"" The salesperson says, ""It's $1000."" The WASP says, ""I'll take it."""

"[NSFW] Never look down on someone Unless you're getting head"

"What's Harry Potter's favorite way of getting down a hill? Walking JK, Rolling."

"Me: Hey Mr. DJ, do you take requests? Dj: Yes. M: Excellent, can you turn it down a bit."

"It's my dream to take a stretch limo to a drive thru, pay at the first window & pick up my food at the second window without moving my car."

"A person has to have a warm heart and a cold beer."