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Joke of the Day

"Man goes to a library asking for a book on suicide... The librarian refuses. He asks why. The librarian replies 'Who'll return the book?'"

"I always enjoy sharing old memories with the @sshole from my old high school... while he is ringing up my groceries."

"TIFU by sleeping with my boss I should be getting a promotion any day now."

"My favorite criminal intent: Robin Hood camping."

"In West Philadelphia born & raised/ through my anus is where I got most of my AIDS - Tom Hanks in Philadelphia'"

"I bought a nice 12 year old scotch yesterday. His parents weren't pleased."

"What does a gay mans penis taste like? Shit!"

"Sometimes, I look at the kids of today and think, ""Thank god I'll be dead by the time you grow up."""

"How did Burger King get Dairy Queen Pregnant? He forgot to wrap his whopper!"

"What do you call someone who worships testicles? Sacrilegious."