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Joke of the Day
"Sent my ex a card that said, ""Get better soon."" He's not ill, just really crap in bed."
Next Joke
"What is the difference between a corrupt cop and a disposable camera? A disposable camera doesn't have to reload 3 times to take 30 shots."
"What's the difference between a cunt punch and fisting? pants"
"If there's Noel.... ...then could a king be born in Israel? (If there's ""No L"", how can there be a king born in ""Is-rye-L"")"
"I can always determine how financially stable I am by how carelessly I press on the gas pedal."
"[at interview] Her: In three words or less, tell me why we should hire you. Me: I'm good with numbers."
"What's black and white and being milked tonight? Michael brown's death"
"When your mom is mad at you and finds anything to throw at you https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_75cA3xmssM"
"I painted my scanner black so it would run faster. Now it can't read."
"What happens when Nigel Farage makes a promise? He brexit."