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Joke of the Day

"Husband comes home with a duck under his arm. ""Look. This is the pig I've been fucking."" The wife says, ""That's not a pig, that's a duck."" The husband says, ""I wasn't talking to you."""

Next Joke
 
"Go ahead lady, call the cops. I have witnesses that say your toddler started it."
"I want to go to Gordon Ramsey's restaurant, throw a plate of risotto against the wall, and say ""Whoever made this is a fucking donkey!"""
"Did you here what the waiter did at the restaurant? He waited"
"A chinese couple moves to Africa and the woman soon becomes pregnant. 9 months later, the woman gives birth to a half African and half Chinese baby. The man names the baby Sum Ting Wong."
"What is the difference between a slut and a bitch? A slut sleeps with everyone. A bitch sleeps with everyone, except you."
"I think the worst part about making your own porn movie is . . . . . .when the couple hear you in the cupboard"
"What's your best mattress joke? Trying to win a new mattress in a contest and I need a clean mattress joke to win (dumb, I know)"
"I'm not racist... ...because I have a color TV!"
"What do you call a lesbian Eskimo? A Klondike"