119740

Joke of the Day

"What is the most successful hotel? Auschwitz, 6 million stars."

"I have a rare mental condition that makes me see a gold next to my submit on reddit Edit: Thanks for the gold!"

"girl [smiling]: hey, how are you!? me [visibly nervous]: not much!"

"Girlfriend: Have you ever been with a fat chick? Me: Nope, you're the first one. Gf: What? Me: What?"

"""UNLESS WE'RE OUT OF CHEESE THERE'S NO REASON TO SCREAM LIKE THAT!"" - me to my kid whenever he throws a tantrum"

"They are removing all the phones in china Seems too many Wings got the Wong number"

"What happens to male anarchists as they get older? They go from having anti-state issues to having prostate issues."

"My dog and I have a system together. We both eat, then we walk... Then we both shit in my neighbors lawn."

"What's worse than AIDS? Beads."

"wander ten miles over the German border, shoot everybody in sight and then claim you were never over the line"