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Joke of the Day
"Knock Knock Who's there ? Annie! Annie who ? Annie-versary !"
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"Why is it when you take a break from Twitter everyone assumes you're happy and in love... Maybe I was in jail."
"What did the blind, deaf and dumb kid get for Christmas? Cancer"
"I heard about a dog that was half bulldog and half shihtzu. Bullshit."
"Hobos are like cats, they'll let you pet them until you stop feeding them cat food."
"[trick or treating] ""Oh, what a cute little...what's she doing?"" Me: potty training. ""In my pumpkin?!"" Me: She likes the heated seat."
"I caught my friend watching gay Cuban porn last night... It was called Juan on Juan."
"What do you call a perverted Magician? Q: What do you call a perverted Magician? A: David ""Cop a Feel"" ...ba dum cha!"
"What is the capital of the United States? Half of what it was last week"
"What's God's favorite guitar chord? G sus"