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Joke of the Day

"Why couldn't the blonde count to 70? Because 69 was a mouthful"

"How do you drown a hipster? In the mainstream."

"Why did the computer split up with the programming language. Because 1 or more arguments were invalid!"

"Dropped my Ant Farm and now the rug is like the first 30-minutes of Saving Private Ryan."

"I quit my job as an accountant It was just too taxing"

"Huh, maybe THIS pizza delivery guy will be the father figure I've been looking for"

"How many Polacks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 5, one to hold the bulb and 4 to spin the ladder."

"Did you hear about that guy who was crushed by his Honda? Police say he died of his own Accord."

"Anyone ever notice ""Seven"" has the word ""even"" in it. That's odd."

"What's the difference between sod and a fat chick? Nothing, sooner or later they will both be laid by a Mexican"