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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a vegetable and a berry? i can't vegetable my dick so far in your ass whoever could pull it out would be crowned king arthur"

"Did you hear the one about Ferguson? It's a riot."

"Next time you're at the bar, ask the bartender for a Ryan Lochte When the bartender asks you what's in a Ryan Lochte? Just say ""I don't know, make something up"""

"Pretending to hold the elevator while secretly pressing ""close door"" is an art."

"What do you call spaghetti that carries a fake ID? an impasta!"

"Geeze, how's all the news in Nepal? It's really shaking me up!"

"The weather and a pussy are similar in one regards When it starts to get wet, it is time get inside."

"Two things I learned from online dating geography and disappointment"

"How do you call a dog without legs? you don't you go and grab him"

"The easiest way to distract a woman is to show her a picture of herself."