119313

Joke of the Day

"Just vacuumed my couch and found 16 bobby pins, 84 cents, 3 kinds of cereal, a spoon and a live hedgehog."

"I asked my dog to marry me and he said no. I am stuck in man's best friendzone."

"Language is cool because it's just a bunch of sounds, but put them in the right order & you can make someone cry or you can order tacos."

"I had an eight course Irish dinner tonight. A six pack of beer, a potato, and a glass of whiskey to finish it off."

"Does the circle of life... become a sphere in 3D?"

"Did you know that diarrhea is hereditary? It runs in your genes!"

"I know they say that looks aren't everything... But have you ever tried wanking to personality?"

"I was such an ugly kid. When I played in the sandbox the cat kept covering me up."

"A guy walks in a library: - Do you have motivational books here? - Yes darling, right there, 3rd row, the second shelf. - Do you have any books closer?"""

"I found a rating for the Sun online. It was only a star."