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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a nutritionist who sidelines as an automotive journalist? A carb-o-rater"

"[Spoiler] Mark Hamill Star Wars joke Mark Hamill is such a loser he didn't even get a single word in the new Star Wars"

"My favorite clean joke: What do you do when you stub your toe? Call a toe truck."

"me: I know it's over, but can I have one last hug? Please? Him: *moves closer. stops & sniffs* omg are you covered in superglue?"

"One does not know true happiness until he gets married But then it's too late... Source: I heard it in a PS2 Raw vs Smackdown game..."

"My phone got married last week. The service was good despite the lousy reception."

"""Did you guys see me get so mad I flipped a table?"" Yes Tony, we saw it. You're 46. You have to stop taking your skateboard to restaurants."

"Why was the women unable to leave the boutique? She couldn't find the Dior"

"- How many Iraqis does it take to launch a Scud missile? - Two. One to launch it one to watch CNN to find out where it landed."

"You know what a satisfied woman sounds like? I didn't think so."