209085

Joke of the Day

"""Did you guys see me get so mad I flipped a table?"" Yes Tony, we saw it. You're 46. You have to stop taking your skateboard to restaurants."

"Why did the DJ get fired as a waiter? Because he'd drop everything"

"I bought a pig for $100 and named him Moo-Ham-Head, I then sold him for $150. Does that make him a profit?"

"stay safe this international men's day. make sure your man is at least 165 degrees in the center"

"Other than Superman and the homeless has anyone used a phone booth in the last 10 years?"

"There once was a girl named Sally with no arms.. ""Knock Knock"" ""Who's there?"" ""Not Sally"""

"So my genetics professor reported this morning that diarrhea has a genetic basis According to her, it runs in our jeans."

"Q: Did you hear about the guy that threw away a duck? A: He got down in the dumps."

"TIME TO RETIRE Q: WHEN DOES A PROSTITUTE KNOW IT TIME TO RETIRE? A: WHEN SHE CAN NO LONGER HIDE THE STRETCHMARKS AROUND HER LIPS."

"What do you call the ghost of a chicken? A poultry-geist."