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Joke of the Day

"""Take it from the top, but do it a bit more boring and awful this time."" --Coldplay's Producer"

"If athletes get Athlete's Foot, what do astronauts get? Missle Toe."

"Did you hear about the man with five penises? His pants fit like a glove."

"Did you hear about the iguana that couldn't mate in captivity? He had a reptile disfunction."

"[Duck support group] ""After i lost Barbara I was doing bread 5, maybe 6 times a day"" *the other ducks nod sympathetically*"

"Why does Stephen Hawking do one-liners? Because he can't do stand up"

"The first sign I wasn't going to be a doctor is when I called Anatomy ""Skeleton Class."" Sign two was failing skeleton class."

"When I die, I want you to carry my casket So you can let me down one last time."

"What do you call a guy who fucks himself? [Ethan Hawke](http://i.imgur.com/tXrW7HU.jpg)."

"What do you call a mexican midget? A paragraph... Because he's not a full essay"