118789

Joke of the Day

"*tries to flirt* *twirls hair in fingers* *fingers get caught in giant knot* *learns to live using only one arm*"

Next Joke
 
"Good news: I recently discovered I was interested in Necrophilia. Bad news: I'm a submissive bottom."
"What has teeth but no mouth? A comb or a saw."
"my doctor refuses to fight me and i think it's cause he saw how i barely cried during my flu shot"
"Pixar has made me feel affection towards rats, bugs, fish, robots, monsters and even cars. The real test would be a movie about coworkers."
"I'm so fucking sick of you guys making Asian-lady stereotypes. Now shut up so I can get back to my nail salon."
"Two deer hunters walk into a bar. The third one, ducks."
"I didn't have fun at the Boston Marathon this year ... back in 2013 it was a blast."
"Hey, pens at the bank: cool it with the chains. You are literally last on my list of things I'd like to steal from a bank."
"Doctors have confirmed that masturbation is life threatening Many men have died after having a stroke"