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Joke of the Day
"It is so cold outside that I saw a politician with his hands in his own pocket"
Next Joke
"Her: Stop stalling and sign the divorce papers. Me: *does ""the divorce papers"" in sign language* THERE I HOPE YOU'RE HAPPY"
"Life starts with everyone cheering when you poop and goes drastically down hill from there."
"I backed a horse at 10/1 yesterday... It came in at quarter past 4."
"BOSS: why are you so late? ME: i definitely wasnt up until 4am watching Hey Arnold ha-ha BOSS: well i was and i got here on time"
"What is the safest place in the galaxy? In the direct line of fire of a Storm Trooper."
"A helium atom walks into a bar. The bartender says ""get out, we don't serve your kind here"". The helium atom did not react."
"Geometry Joke. So I was in my Geometry class and my teacher was giving us a ton of homework. So I said to her ""stop being an angle side side."" Edit: thanks hypervelocityvomit."
"Q. How do you know a blonde has been using the computer? A. There is cheese in front of the mouse."
"I truly believe that there are some people who listen to you when you talk and there's other people who just wait for it to be their turn."