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Joke of the Day

"How to pick up a girl Me: Are you interested in having the best sex of your life? Her: No. Me: Well then you came to the right place ;)"

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"""We're up all night to get Loki"" -Daft Punk feat. The Avengers"
"What did Thor say to the weaver fixing his cape? What are your Hemsworth?"
"They say video games make u violent, but hundreds of years ago we burned people alive for being witches so probably humans are just garbage"
"Whilst having an argument with my wife about housework, she asked me to look at it from a woman's point of view ... So I looked out the kitchen window."
"Here's a joke I saw on the internet recently that I think we can all relate to http://i.imgur.com/ijAmlhi.png"
"How do blind people know when they're done wiping?"
"What's the difference between a Twitter post and a Russian Novel? A Twitter post is limited to 140 characters"
"How many South Americans does it take to change a light bulb? A Brazilian."
"If I were an attractive girl, I would introduce myself as Hottie McHotterson because I would still be an asshole."
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