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Joke of the Day

"How does the basis of all TIFU's start.... by doing what you see on reddit."

"Me: this a rush song? Bartender: yeah, you a fan? Me: does this answer your questions? *lifts shirt to reveal giant tattoo that says ""no""*"

"How do you know Bono is selfish? He does a lot of Pro-Bono work."

"Why do sovereign citizens never turn on the lights? The sound of electricity triggers their PTSD."

"Can't you just live in the moment, Phil? Every time we kill a bison or light a fire you have to draw it in a cave with your fancy stick."

"I'm really worried of discrimination based on skin color during the Trump regime The thing is, unfortunately, I'm not orange..."

"Technical support had a caller complaining that her mouse was hard to control with the dust cover on. The cover turned out to be the plastic bag the mouse was packaged in."

"What do you call a police officer's favorite metal? Copper"

"How do you get dragon milk? A cow with short legs"

"This woman I met last night says she wants a guy who is ""spontaneous and fun"". Yet when I tapped on the kitchen window uninvited late at night dressed as a clown it is all panic and screaming."