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Joke of the Day

"Ever have one of those dreams where you're falling and you wake up when you hit the ground? I had one of those, except I didn't wake up after I hit the ground."

"What do you call nuts on the wall? : walnuts. What do you call nuts on a chest? : chestnuts . What do you call nuts on your chin? A dick in your mouth."

"Knock Knock *Knock Knock.* Who's there? *This bagel is for.* This bagel is for who? *Whom. This bagel is for whom.*"

"There's a fine line between fishing and standing on the shore looking like an idiot. The fraction guy reminded me of this."

"What do you call a armless, legless man in water? Bob."

"You're riding a horse, a giraffe is running next to you and a lion is chasing you. What do you do? Get your drunk as off the carousel."

"How do you tell X chromosomes from Y chromosomes? You pull down their genes."

"Asians offer Whites the secret to telling them apart. Whites accept but deliver message to the wrong Asian."

"Why did Karl Marx dislike Earl Grey? Because all proper tea is theft."

"did you know Arnold Palmer was a real human before he became a drink made by Arizona"