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Joke of the Day

"A dentist friend of mine had a T-shirt which said on the front: Let me put my tool in your mouth... and on the back: ...and I will fill your cavity."

"gOOD JOKE Bug run up tree into butthole."

"It's 2012, aka the future. Don't ask me to print shit out, sign, scan, fax, etc. You're not the CIA. Dial it down, Patty Printsalot."

"If your legs open up faster than Google's homepage. You are not girlfriend material."

"Autocorrect is like my girlfriend. It always changes what I said to something I didn't mean."

"I don't get why people say ""They were busting their ass""? Wasn't it already cracked to begin with?"

"Ebola lingers in semen for nine months... I couldn't think of a decent punchline, but there's a winner out there for this headline for sure. . Highest voted comment wins the punchline."

"""Should the cabin lose pressure oxygen masks will drop from the overhead area. Please place the bag over your own mouth and nose before assisting children or other adults acting like children."""

"There are two rules for success: Rule #1. Never reveal everything you know"

"What do you call a nautical plunderer who assists with the flight of an aircraft? A co-pirate"