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Joke of the Day

"Baby, it's cold outside. I checked my weather app."

"Dads are like boomerangs.... I hope. Edit: Guys I'm so confused, wtf is going on"

"I am giving up eating red meats. I'm going cold turkey."

"What's the difference between an Asian and a dumb white girl? The Asian try to get the A, but the white girl try to get the D"

"My friend makes urinal cakes for a living... ...it takes him 35 minutes to bake each batch."

"I have a phobia of over engineered buildings I have a complex complex complex."

"A joke walks into a bar... Bartender says woah! I've never *meta* joke before"

"How did German men pick up Jewish women in the 1940s? With a dustpan and broom."

"9 year old told me this today. My favorite exercise is a mix between a crunch and a lunge... It's called lunch. Dad, I'm hungry."

"Me and my wife, we have decided that we don't want kids. They are not gonna like it."